Transactional Love to Unconditional Love
(Fair warning. Relationships, and love are a sensitive subject to speak on, everybody’s way of how they chose to exist all serve a purpose, everyone’s paradigm serves a purpose. We speak on these things because it’s a fact that the evolution of humanity will show the contrast of these aspects more and more as time moves forward)
“Emotional love still exists within the physical third dimensional paradigm of existence and therefore duality is inherent within it. Since we were born into our new world, we were conditioned to think that love was dependent upon our behavior through countless experiences whilst growing up. It was built into our human mind that this is the way love works. As a result, many of our relationships are based within this emotional love that seemingly requires an exchange. We expect emotional gratification for our love and we develop a dependence on it being reflected back at us in some way. We were similarly conditioned to believe that everybody needs this emotional love and the more we receive it, the happier we will be.”
from Jasmine Maricarmen
Christopher here - So this is , one, starting to get into relationship paradigms (Which I will create a whole Blog Page for Paradigms soon). Two, is starting to describe how most relationships on this planet exist. Most relationships exist in a emotional exchange that might not be measured tit for tat, but the love comes with expectations. People will say they exude unconditional love, but the more and more they give of themselves to somebody, if the other person doesn't seem to be reciprocating, the person giving love, and not receiving according to their expectations, or way they envision, will start to feel unease, or unfulfilled. That is not unconditional love. Unconditional love is given without the expectation of receiving..
So let me talk about Love Languages for a second. I think love languages are a crock of shit, a fallacy produced by ego in order to measure how much love is given, and how it is given. Here's why. Listen to this sentence. “If you do these two love languages, that's when I feel loved by you the most.” “I prefer this love language. It makes me feel cared for.” If you listen to those two sentences clearly without the ego involved, and listen purely from the soul, you will clearly see, hear and feel that love languages are basically a paradigm or mechanism in order for somebody to feel more loved or cared for from an external act from somebody - in order to feel a certain way. So the feeling of being cared for or loved is dependent upon somebody's actions, words or whatever aspects the love language is specifically favoring or doing.
This is how you can realize who is in “emotional exchange love” versus “soul embodiment love”. If somebody is talking about what love languages they prefer in order to feel a certain way, that is an emotional exchange that validates one’s emotional well-being. Love does not have a language. If we are talking about the love that is God, which is the love that we are. There is no love language for that. That's like trying to decipher what God is through human language. Which can not be successfully done. So the actual pure love that God created, that we were created to embody, does not have a language. The love that God is cannot be portrayed or simplified through an act of giving a gift. But the paradox is - is that actions, and words are a small reflection of the frequency of love in the third dimension. Because in the 3D reality there's only so many ways to express love, such as the love languages. But the problem is. A lot of people will show you unsatisfaction, unease, unhappiness when not receiving love they way they want, desire, or envision. “Why aren't you doing this love language for me that I either enjoy, love, appreciate, want, need, desire?” They are showing that they are dependent upon you for their security in a relationship from specific actions.
I am in no way saying. Somebody should be perfectly fine with receiving nothing at all. But everyone has a signature of how their love is expressed. And love has it’s seasons. How often love is expressed may fluctuate depending on circumstances. But it’s also true that some people will need some level of reassurance, and validation in order to feel secure with the relationship. Now a lot of us in this reality are fine with that. Most people are fine with giving reassurance because they also need, or desire reassurance in return. A lot of us in this reality are playing the love language game. There's nothing wrong with it. Whatever serves you is what serves you. Whatever you're happy with is what you're happy with. A lot of us are dependent upon this exchange in relationships in order to feel loved. But. Problems may occur when the differences between people’s desire to be more Soul Based clash with giving External Emotional Validation..
Now this is how you tell if somebody's in Soul Embodiment Love. If you strip away the love languages, any sort of forced inauthentic validation, and you just exist as you are, in your natural form and way of existing. And if the other person doesn't show you unease, doesn't show you distress, doesn't show you dissatisfaction, and continues to love you, and accepts how you love, and how you naturally exist in relationship. In their natural form, they are showing you that they are not dependent upon what you do in order for you to feel loved. And a lot of this is also a factor of alignment. There are different variances of alignment in love and relationship. Some partners can exist in relationship with very little exchange. Some exists in love with lots of exchange. If partners are happy and content no matter what their relationship is like. This is a resonance in their alignment. If one’s alignment is less action, or word based, and the other person desires words, and action, or one language over the other. This is not only an issue based on 2 people’s unique frequency on how they exist in relationship, but also an issue with alignment, and could go into an even deeper level of 3rd dimensional, 4th dimensional, 5th dimensional relationship paradigms.
To me. Unconditional, Soul Based, Embodied Love. Is realizing that we are love. And the alignment and resonance we feel with someone is what creates a relationship. Not the specific level of exchange. “What are you doing for me, and vice versa?” To me there should be a natural harmony between 2 people in alignment in the 5th Dimension / Frequency. Not every single aspect of their life may align perfectly. But the relationship is a true marriage with the divine. The bond is a connection that they feel even when physically separated from one another, because in 5th dimensional consciousness, the illusion of separation has been dismantled. To me. There is no missing someone you are connected to on a quantum level. If God / Source is with us no matter where we are. The people we are fused with are also with us everywhere we are. In 3D, the illusion of separateness is strong because the ego only sees and views reality from separation. Quantum entanglement with a lover isn’t Embodied
Infinite Love, if you feel ever you desire guidance on any relationship complexities, feel free to send in a form, message, schedule a call, or glance over any other service of mine/ours